Narrative:

Aircraft X had a scheduled pickup time from the hotel at xa:10 local time. [An hour prior to that] I checked and discovered our flight was delayed approximately 5 hours due to anticipated weather at ewr. I thought this was odd because normally the company only institutes delays for domestic flights; not international. At this point I knew we were probably going to be illegal. I talked to the captain at about xa:15 and he confirmed our delay. I went for breakfast and to exercise and upon my return I was told by my captain that the crew desk was trying to give us a 'soft start' to increase the length of our duty day and avoid any additional crew pay. I normally would check crew scheduling but in these cases I avoid it due the concept of a 'hostage message.' I don't want to click and acknowledge something without first checking legalities. After talking with the captain; I called crew management at xc:31 and reluctantly accepted a soft start. In hindsight I don't think this was legal; but I'm still unsure. At xe:08 I called them again to ask more questions about the soft start. He reassured me everything was legal; so instead of going with my gut feelings; I went with the expertise and operational knowledge of the managers at crew management. Fast forward; we flew to ewr and land in the snowstorm. After landing; we waited 3 hours and 51 minutes for a gate. The entire time we were being moved by ATC along barely plowed; hard to see taxiways at night. Company dispatch; company ramp; company operations; port authority; were of no help. It was almost impossible to get anyone to answer our calls on the radio. We were truly on our own.during flight the entire crew was deliriously fatigued. We slept and had prepared for a xa:10 pickup. It was impossible to shift our rest 5 hours on a non-acclimated international trip. As a result we were not at our peak. After landing it took the entire crew and 100% focus to navigate over the barely visible snow-covered taxiways for 3 hrs and 51 minutes. The length of our duty day was 19:41 for a 3-man crew. If you look at the pairing; you will see the company 'fudged' our duty and showed us on duty starting at xf:00 local time instead of xa:35 local time [six hours later than originally planned]. The actual time we all started was xa:35 local. I had even declared fit for duty before that. The crew desk accomplished their goal of completing the flight and avoiding any additional pay for the crew. At this point; that part is not important. What I have learned is that a 'soft start' is not safe. My original inclination to avoid allowing the company to do a soft start was the right decision. I allowed myself to be talked into/pressured into calling crew management back and agreeing to the soft start. The result was extreme fatigue and subpar performance. We got lucky. In the future; I will never allow myself to be soft started in the future and will not answer any calls from crew management.

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Original NASA ASRS Text

Title: First Officer reported extensive delays prior to takeoff and after landing resulting in the crew exceeding duty time.

Narrative: Aircraft X had a scheduled pickup time from the hotel at XA:10 local time. [An hour prior to that] I checked and discovered our flight was delayed approximately 5 hours due to anticipated weather at EWR. I thought this was odd because normally the company only institutes delays for domestic flights; not international. At this point I knew we were probably going to be illegal. I talked to the Captain at about XA:15 and he confirmed our delay. I went for breakfast and to exercise and upon my return I was told by my Captain that the crew desk was trying to give us a 'soft start' to increase the length of our duty day and avoid any additional crew pay. I normally would check crew scheduling but in these cases I avoid it due the concept of a 'hostage message.' I don't want to click and acknowledge something without first checking legalities. After talking with the Captain; I called crew management at XC:31 and reluctantly accepted a soft start. In hindsight I don't think this was legal; but I'm still unsure. At XE:08 I called them again to ask more questions about the soft start. He reassured me everything was legal; so instead of going with my gut feelings; I went with the expertise and operational knowledge of the managers at crew management. Fast forward; we flew to EWR and land in the snowstorm. After landing; we waited 3 hours and 51 minutes for a gate. The entire time we were being moved by ATC along barely plowed; hard to see taxiways at night. Company Dispatch; Company Ramp; Company Operations; Port Authority; were of no help. It was almost impossible to get anyone to answer our calls on the radio. We were truly on our own.During flight the entire crew was deliriously fatigued. We slept and had prepared for a XA:10 pickup. It was impossible to shift our rest 5 hours on a non-acclimated international trip. As a result we were not at our peak. After landing it took the entire crew and 100% focus to navigate over the barely visible snow-covered taxiways for 3 hrs and 51 minutes. The length of our duty day was 19:41 for a 3-man crew. If you look at the pairing; you will see the company 'fudged' our duty and showed us on duty starting at XF:00 local time instead of XA:35 local time [Six hours later than originally planned]. The actual time we all started was XA:35 local. I had even declared fit for duty before that. The crew desk accomplished their goal of completing the flight and avoiding any additional pay for the crew. At this point; that part is not important. What I have learned is that a 'soft start' is not safe. My original inclination to avoid allowing the company to do a soft start was the right decision. I allowed myself to be talked into/pressured into calling crew management back and agreeing to the soft start. The result was extreme fatigue and subpar performance. We got lucky. In the future; I will never allow myself to be soft started in the future and will not answer any calls from crew management.

Data retrieved from NASA's ASRS site and automatically converted to unabbreviated mixed upper/lowercase text. This report is for informational purposes with no guarantee of accuracy. See NASA's ASRS site for official report.